Good questions do not need the correct answers.

Bad questions have only one answer.

Good questions always hit us and make us ponder.

Bad questions are the phrases that merely lead to ‘yes’ or ‘no’.

Conversation A

CHILD: Dad, my friend made me angry at school.

DAD: Which friend?

CHILD: Nina. She is very mean.

DAD: Did she bully you?

CHILD: Yes. She stepped on my book.

DAD: Did you tell the teacher?

CHILD: Yes.

DAD: Did the teacher punish her?

CHILD: No. The teacher just told her off.

DAD: It’s OK. It’s just a small matter. You will be fine.

Conversation B

CHILD: Dad, my friend made me angry at school.

DAD: Tell me what happened.

CHILD: Nina stepped on my book and never said sorry.

DAD: Do you think Nina did it on purpose?

CHILD: Err…..I think no. She accidentally stepped on it. But she never said sorry!

DAD: What can you do if you are angry at your friend?

CHILD: I can tell the teacher.

DAD: Instead of telling the teacher, do you think you can tell your friend that you are angry at her?

CHILD: But she will not listen to me.

DAD: If she won’t listen to you, how would you make her listen?

CHILD: Maybe I can tell her the book will be torn and it won’t look nice anymore.

DAD: What if the book wasn’t left on the floor? Would it have been stepped on by Nina?

CHILD: OK it’s not all Nina’s fault. But she should say sorry.

DAD: Do you think talking to her politely will help?

CHILD: I guess so.

DAD: Now show me how would you talk to Nina in a polite way?

CHILD: Excuse me Nina, you stepped on my book. Can you be careful next time?

DAD: That sounds pretty nice. Will you be polite to your friend next time?

CHILD: Sure.

“I finished my school work. Can I play now?”

“Are you done with the extra work books that I bought for you?”

“I did two pages already. Can I play?”

“Do four more pages and make sure you do it correctly. You must pay more attention to your studies otherwise you will be left behind. ”

“But I’m tired. Can I do it later please?”

“No. Do it now.”

“Why?”

“Because I said so.”

A child begged for play time. Does it sound familiar?  But what does it have to do with children’s rights?

Every human being has their own rights. So do children.

Nevertheless children do not know their rights. Some children are not allowed to go to school. Some are not allowed to have choices in daily life. Some get excessive physical punishment for making minor mistakes. Some are exploited with drugs and sexual abuse. Some are left unattended and neglected.

According to UNICEF, “Human rights apply to all age groups; children have the same general human rights as adults. But children are particularly vulnerable and so they also have particular rights that recognize their special need for protection.

In 1989, The Convention on the Rights of the Child sets out the rights that must be realised for children to develop their full potential, free from hunger and want, neglect and abuse. It reflects a new vision of the child. Children are neither the property of their parents nor are they helpless objects of charity. They are human beings and are the subject of their own rights. The Convention offers a vision of the child as an individual and as a member of a family and community, with rights and responsibilities appropriate to his or her age and stage of development. By recognising children’s rights in this way, the Convention firmly sets the focus on the whole child.”

If we wish to protect our children, we need to educate them about their rights from young. We need to let them make decisions according to their maturity and capabilities.  We need to give them freedom of expression. We need to guide them to think and act sensibly.

Ask yourself:

1. Do I spend time with my child to do things he likes?

2. Does my child have the opportunities to spend time with other family members?

3. Have I ever threatened my child I will give him away if he is ‘naughty’?

4. Do I listen attentively to my child when he talks?

5. Does my child set his own timetable for studies, play and rest?

6. Do I keep my promises to my child?

7. Do I always use the phrase “because I said so”?

8. Do I discipline my child my own way even though he thinks it is ‘not fair’?

9. Do I trust my child?

10. Do I place judgment on everything my child does?

11. Do I compare my child’s abilities and achievement with his peers all the time?

12. Do I allow my child express his opinions on issues that affect him?

13. Do I force my child to do things that he is uncomfortable with?

14. Do I let my child help me with errands?

15. Am I sure my child is safe when I am not around?

16. Do I encourage my child to respect everyone without discrimination?

17. Do I encourage my child to learn different cultures?

18. Do I apologise to my child if I did something wrong?

Articles of the Convention on the Rights of the Child

Say YEAH to ‘No Plastic Bag Day’ implemented in Penang and Selangor in year 2010!

Next, say STRANGE to ‘Everyday a Plastic Bag Day’ implemented in Kuala Lumpur, the Federal Territory of Malaysia.

Ironic enough, since the launch of ‘No Plastic Bag Day’ in Selangor early this year, the Kuala Lumpurian need to be alert that if they are going to shop on Saturday, make sure they bring along shopping bags if they visit shopping malls in Bandar Utama, Sunway, Subang and so forth. Whilst for residents of Selangor, they need not worry about bringing shopping bags if they are heading Mid-Valley Megamall or KLCC Suria.

What a joke!

We who live in the Klang Valley, who often travel between Kuala Lumpur and Selangor, have to learn the differences of rules and regulations in both areas. Now we have to learn which places that provide plastic bags on Saturday and which do not. Bear in mind that if you visit Cold Storage Supermarkets, they do not provide plastic bags on Thursday and Saturday nationwide. A bit confusing huh?

So what is the fuss? Let’s just bring our shopping bags everywhere we go.

As much as we love our mother earth, we are born in the plastic bag culture. It is utterly true that people who have been living with plastic bags for decades, will not tune into the ‘No Plastic Bag’ mode instantly. We need a push, a lot of reminders and practices. I can see people will not turn away the offer of plastic bags for convenience sake. After all, who welcomes troubles?

Urged by MPs to implement ‘No Plastic Bag Day’ campaign, The Mayor of Kuala Lumpur City Hall told the press that DBKL will observe and evaluate the effectiveness of the campaign by Selangor government, then decide if they will or will not adopt the idea. What a big joke! The Federal Territory is falling behind in environmental care with such a lame reason. This inevitably gives most people excuses not to play their role as a efficient citizen.

‘No Plastic Bag Day’ is the beginning of environmental care awareness campaign, we have a long way to go. Much more environmental friendly approaches must be introduced and enforced in the country especially forest conservation, town planning and development, energy and resources management, traffic system and control, waste management, lifestyle and education.

At TotalChild Preschool, we can do our small but crucial part, that is, lifestyle and education. We believe that children learn by role modeling. We show children that we care about the environment by doing the followings:

1) 3 R practice – reduce, reuse and recyle

2) minimising the use of chemical for cleaning by using garbage enzyme

3) adopting ‘LESS meat and processed food, MORE vegetables and fruits’ approach in serving meals

4) avoiding the use of disposable plastic and Styrofoam utensil

5) organising talks and campaigns to create awareness about environmental care

6) educating children about the adverse effect of pollutions such as ‘greenhouse effect’ and ‘global warming’

Hopefully we will produce new generations with strong awareness about the environmental care.

Parents, are you doing your part?

“We do not inherit the Earth, we borrow it from our children”

有人说，孩子是天使，那么地天真无邪。

有人说，孩子是一张白纸，等待增添生命的色彩。

有人说，孩子是大人的镜子，处处反映大人的言行举止。

我说，孩子是一份特别的礼物，你在期待他的到来，却不确定是不是你想象的那样。

你可能得到惊喜，你可能被吓到；你可能觉得他很合你意，你可能觉得他很不适用。

但是，当这份特别的礼物落到你手中，从此他的命运就被你操纵。

每个礼物都包含心思，值得你去爱惜他。

每个孩子都很特别，值得你去发掘他。

世上没有教不好的孩子，只有不会教的父母。

p/s 当你觉得教得好累，是时候探讨你是不是缺乏知识和技巧，赶快去上课补一补。

Siew Wah, principal of TotalChild Preschool Kota Kemuning

When I first met this little girl in my class a year ago, I realized that she is the reflection of me when I was young.

She is bright. She is able to speak, read and write very well. She is friendly and thoughtful. She tolerates with children of her age over issues. She has all it takes to be the teacher’s pet. She seems perfect in everyone’s eyes.

But I saw more than that. She is hesitant to try new things. She is self-conscious about expressing herself in the class. She feels uneasy to be the center of attention. She wants to do what she is already good at. She always stays in her comfort zone.

She has no confidence to be herself!

When I was at her age, I was a very quiet girl. I have no self confidence at all. I became quieter when I was in primary school. I did not even have the guts to raise my hand to tell teacher when I wanted to go to washroom. Of course I was not given a chance in classroom to express and promote myself due to my quietness.

I was once thought that teachers did not notice my presence and I was not important at all. I still remember I told my mother that I did not want to go to school anymore.  Instead I wanted  to sell ‘kuih’ made by my mother.

Until I was told by a Malay teacher who praised me, “Hey, you have done so well in Bahasa Malaysia. Very good indeed.”

That was really a great encouragement for me. The funny part was I did not realize that I was good in BM until then. Due to this incident, all in a sudden, I realized I was NOT a ‘nobody’. I started to ‘shine’ in my class simply because I felt good about myself.  A year later I was selected to participate in a ‘pertandingan syarahan BM’ in a district level and I got the third place.

Since then I knew who my soul mate was, that is, CONFIDENCE.

Back to this little girl in my class.

Today she has stepped out from her comfort zone. She dares to challenge the teacher’s ideas. She is more than just an obedient child. She has confidence in herself!

Confidence grows when love, encouragement and opportunities are freely given. 

On her 6^th Birthday, I bought her a storybook. I wrote in Chinese:

有自信的孩子最美丽

会感恩,懂珍惜的孩子最漂亮

愿你永远美丽又漂亮

Happy Birthday Tan Ling!

Teacher Emily, TotalChild Preschool Menjalara Kepong

It was a lovely morning.

While I was organizing the class, A hurried to see me, “Teacher Emily, a fish in the aquarium died!”
So I quickly followed A to check what had happened.

I then noticed that one of our pet guppies was trapped in the shallow water between the aquatic leaves. Not knowing how long the fish had been trapped, I told A that it was still alive because it was still breathing.

A was very glad to hear that. However he asked again, “Why the fish can’t swim? Is it because of broken bones?” I smiled and replied, “Maybe.” I did not take his concern seriously.
 
Then A suggested taking the fish to see a doctor. That was a wild idea! I have not heard about a fish see the doctor. Who would take a fish to see the doctor? It is just a fish after all.

In order to find an easy way out, I tried to comfort A by telling him the fish was going to be fine soon. We should let it rest for a while and hopefully it could swim again. Even so, A was still worried. He decided to stay by the aquarium to accompany the ailing fish.

It must have been half an hour later or so, we then found the fish died eventually.

I felt terrible. I was sure A felt even worse. We could have saved the fish’s life if we took the fish to the doctor, maybe?

I learned a valuable lesson from this incident.  Children care about things around them, be it the tiniest thing, and adults tend to overlook it.

Shannon Low 有话说

 前几天，三五知己搞了个聚会，聊生活、聊工作、聊经济、聊孩子…… 其中一个就铁定地说开幼儿园最好做，因为不受经济不景气的影响，每个孩子都必须上学嘛！

“做你这一行既简单又好赚，不然幼儿园也不会到处都是！”

“就是啰，女人和小孩的钱最好赚。”

Well…… 自己有苦自己知。谁说这行不受经济影响？本来想让孩子三岁去学校玩玩，现在还是等四、五岁吧；本来要送孩子到很好的学校，现在有书读就好；本来想多生几一个，现在不生了。 妈呀！这不是天大的影响吗？

在生意的角度，我说， 有人数就好做，没有人数，你什么都不用做，等关门吧！

天下哪有免费的午餐？没有付出，哪有收获？社会是现实的。

在人文的角度，我说，办幼儿园，是个整颗心在工作，不是pandai pandai就能够做啰。

第一，要有心（passion）

第二，要用心（commitment）

第三，要细心（care）

第四，要耐心（patience）

第五，要真心 （genuine） 

唯有用整颗心去培育幼儿园里的种子，树苗才会在最佳生长环境下愈长愈壮！这一切一切，是一种使命感。我们期待的回报，就是父母对我们的欣赏和赞赏！

所以，我在乎的不只是数字，更在乎素质。

我的朋友觉得我在这一行待这么久，真不可思议。人马座的我不会在一处待很久的，除非使命还未完成！